Getting past the Fear

How does one convince themselves to do something uncomfortable? How do you get past your fear of what could happen and come through to the other side and achieve the success you so desire? I have often found myself frozen to the fear of what could happen--not sure of the outcome and thinking it will not come out the way I had hoped or even return a positive outcome. 

The reality is that there is something that God has placed in each of us to do, to achieve, to succeed. We just need to recognize it and go forward. We must at least try--what happens if you try? What does it mean to fail? Does failure mean that you can't try again? What is it that makes the successful strive, even when others and resources say they can't? 

Some call it courage, others call it determination, will, desire...whatever you want to call it, that's what you must find in yourself. What it will take is the willingness to go past any feelings of fear or of failure. What we all need is the courage to fail, to trip, to endure hiccups...these are all learning opportunities that will move us forward to our desired goals or Gods intended calling for our lives. 

Get up!! If you get knocked down, get up again!! If you trip, stumble, but keep moving!! If you are overwhelmed, pray, take a rest, then get up and get at it again!!!! Never allow fear to cloud your view of what could be!! Know that God NEVER makes mistakes, so wouldn't that include YOU??? In you, there are strengths and gifts that God hasn't even shown you because He knows you must be ready for them--there is no room for your fear in the places that God wants to take you!!

Get courage!! Get determination!! Get will!!!!!! God is waiting...get ready!!!!

Onward!

Digging Deeper!!

I’ve been in a period of digging.  Digging deep to find out why I spend more time talking down on myself and cheering on and motivating others.  I’m doing this because over 3 years ago, I went through a weight loss journey and lost about 45 pounds.  My goal was actually closer to 80 pounds, but I started saying that the size I got to was good and that I was going to “play” there—buy smaller clothes, eat what I wanted, not workout the same way I had done before.  I had decided that since I was not in a 9 to 5 situation, I would focus on providing others the ability to finally get fit.  I went to class and started the process of working toward my personal training certification.  I remember freaking out every class because I was looking around and it seemed that everyone else was more fit than me and at it longer than me.  I was discouraged on a regular basis and it affected my studying to prepare for the test.  Needless to say, I didn’t pass the test and then convinced myself that it wasn’t what I was supposed to be doing.  I also put about 25 pounds back on and while I was still smaller, I had allowed myself to not reach my actual goal.  This is not the first time something like this has happened.  I just didn’t really understand or realize what I had been doing to myself…until now.

So I was looking back over my life and I remember even in my teen years doing the negative self-talk.  I regularly convinced myself that I couldn’t do certain things or would make rash decisions, thinking I couldn’t get any better. 

I’m actually a very positive person.  I see the glass half full, even when it’s EMPTY.  But when it comes to me, I have been my worst enemy!!  Why do we do these things to ourselves?  I think it has been the “Christian thing” to never brag or see yourself in a positive light.  It’s a form of humility that is supposed to ensure that we never see ourselves better than anyone else.  I get that and recognize that my skills and talents are due to the favor of God; but I kind of took that thinking and focused my attention on taking myself down a notch on a regular basis.  My looks, my body, my abilities…you name it, I did it!!  I have even compared myself to others—in magazines, the internet, walking down the street…ugh!!

What we have to realize is that it’s okay for us to be positive and believe that we CAN.  It doesn’t take any less humility as long as we understand where it comes from.  I have even gone as far as to feel guilty for the person I am and for having the talents that I have.  Yeah, that has to stop.

The thing is this:  when we spend more time telling ourselves what we can’t do than what we can, we’re really telling GOD what He can’t do within US!  I can no longer contradict my desire to be God’s mouthpiece if I tell myself that I can’t do it or can't do it as well as others, whatever IT is!!!

So how do we get past this way of thinking?  What I’ve started to do is change the way I think.  I’ve stopped following up any positive thinking and comparisons with bad thinking and unbelief.  I spend more time talking about what I CAN and WILL…no more negative for me!!!

Getting back to the weight loss…I’m back on track and won’t look back.  I’m also going to look into another personal training certification—it’s really my love and I know that I’m the best person to work with people:  I’ve been heavy and I know what it’s like to try.

It is important to your well-being to continually be positive and believe.  Believe that you CAN.  Believe that you WILL.  KNOW that it is possible—THEN JUST DO IT!!

Onward!!

Fight your Fear!!

For a while, I’ve been in a kind of state of waiting—a suspended animation, if you will.  I wasn’t sure why…until now.

I’ve always been someone who tried to be like everyone else:  get the job, work the job—reap the financial benefits and be happy with that.  Well, that would always work for a while, at least until I learned the job so well that I could do it with my eyes closed.  I would become bored, looking for the next thing to do.  The randomness of the job would be agonizing for me!!  The hard part is that no one around me would understand.   I would go to other departments and learn what they do, become friends with people in other sections to gain a new experience and fight the boredom.  It was great when I could go to a boss and ask for more work or could become involved in a special project; I could sink my teeth into something new.  It was cool, for a while, but it would never be enough.  I would have singing gigs and while they were great too, I always thought I could be doing more.

Fast forward to now.  All of those times that I was dealing with a job, I connected myself to what I was doing and took pride in my ability to learn and do a job very well.  I missed the fact that I was compiling a set of usable skills that would invariably intimidate bosses, fellow co-workers and even resume reviewers.  Since losing my job in 2010, I have fought internally with the feeling of needing the security of a “regular” job and then the pull (from God) to do much more. 

I remember every interview I had I would be asked “what is it you want to do?”  I said “I want to make a difference”—as the years went on, it became apparent that my thought of “making a difference” might not be fully understood.   The reality is that God has been speaking to me since 2010 telling me that all of the skills, abilities and even my MBA have been given to me to use—ALL OF THEM.  I have been given an open field of opportunity to do whatever I can to “Make a Difference”. 

Since I always thought differently, I’ve spent a lot of time beating myself up and holding myself back from my calling because of it.  I’ve been living in a state of fear—not knowing why or how to get out of it.  Now I know how and why.  The fear of failure can keep a person from so many blessings.  It can also change the view of your value, your skill and your special-ness.  It makes you defensive and full of excuses as to why you “can’t”. 

Thanks to a loving “push” from my love and continual validations from God, I have begun a process of plowing through—retraining my brain to accept that I have many things to offer, make detailed plans instead of just wishes, and walk in the new reality of FEARLESSNESS.  How is all this possible?  It starts when you choose to not be fearful and you determine that your thoughts considering yourself will be positive—I have been an expert at motivating, mentoring, cheering on, and valuing others, but I’ve been horrible at doing the same thing for myself.  I thought it was just the way it was…clearly, I was misinformed!!

The thing is, you can be told by the world that you have value, but until you value yourself it won’t become your reality!  So over time, I have developed a few opportunities to utilize all that I have to offer.  I held myself back, not sure that any of them would be acceptable because I wasn’t thinking specifically what I could do to help.  I’m now rethinking how best to present my skills to my new clients and am setting up my plans and goals to move forward!!

Allow God to lead you to your calling.  Know that it will probably be out of the box, out of the norm and out of your comfort zone.  However, it WILL be what you love and you will find yourself personally fulfilled!! 

Onward!